Okay Shenzhen, Here I am: Adventures in Ikea Furniture Assembly

Last time we met I was describing the feeling of utter dread I felt as I surveyed the pile of boxes that constituted my new Karsten sectional sofa...

My elation over the successful order and delivery was now replaced by disbelief. Surely one cannot assemble an entire Ikea sectional sofa using an allen Key. And where were the directions anyway? And why is it, in making them universal they are understandable to no one? PANIC?

After a few minutes of hyper ventilation I rallied. There has to be a solution - I can't just leave this pile of boxes in the middle of my living room - it would not be the comfortable nap place I envisioned. Okay Sharon, you are smart...let's think...

Wait, doesn't Ikea offer an assembly service? I am sure I have heard of this from others...For a few Yuan I could have someone take care of this mess for me. Excellent. Now I just have to figure out how to arrange for this to happen...time to call in the team!

Now I am going to let you in on the true secret of my survival so far. I like to think it is my own feisty independence and sense of adventure but the truth is...my team at Walmart China saves my butt several times a day. I have 4 of the most amazing women on my team. They are mostly amazing because of their ability to sort out any weird situation I get myself into. They write me notes, communicate with my cleaning lady, landlord, driver, delivery people...you name it they organize for me. I was fully confident they were going to help me sort this.

After a rather long and complicated procedure (involving multiple telephone calls, my driver going to Ikea with some money and my receipt and several more telephone calls) it was all set...on Saturday someone was coming to my apartment to assemble the sofa. Yahoo! I can't wait for Saturday!

When Saturday arrived I was prepared. Because most things in China seem to take a lot longer than I think they should I blocked my day. I was ready. I had my team on stand-by to explain any weirdness. The air-conditioning was on creating a nice ambient temperature for sofa assembly. I was so excited I was tempted to bake him a cake.

At 9:10 my hero arrived...and spent the next 37 minutes assembling an Ikea sectional sofa by himself. Even though the instructions clearly show this is at least a two person job (to be fair he did use a drill and an hammer - clear proof of the allen key hoax). Without reservation I must say this nameless man is my hero. Like all heroes he achieved superhuman results with seeming little effort...and it looked a little something like this:

Figuring out what Sharon did, opening the boxes and beginning to assemble the sofa